Love ‘IS’ blind Or Love ‘MUST’ be blind??! (Chapter : 9)

08/01/10

“Honesty”. What is the definition of this word? Is it meaning that we can’t lie and everything we do or say must be accordingly to rules and trustworthiness?
In a relationship or in a marriage, Honesty & Trustworthy are a string to tie man & woman (husband and wife) together. If one party gave up on the word… the whole thing will be shattered into pieces and that will be the end of the entire relationship or marriage.

Let me view back of some histories of polygamy marriage in the olden days. Man could marry a few women as wives, but in the opposite way, married women will be put on death punishment if she ever being caught having affairs with any man. I’m not trying to say that woman can go on cheating on man like how they use to do to us. What I’m trying to say is until today, some of the people in this society still carry on these stupid facts that man can have a few relationships while they can’t accept woman to do the same to them!

I have a very close girl friend. She is married, and now she is 4 months pregnant. She treats her husband very nice and I can see the glow of happiness in her face.
Unfortunately... 1 day while I was out having lunch with my colleagues, I SAW her husband kissing and making out with another woman in the car!! I go closer to take a better glimpse and IS really HIM!! Well... I was close enough for him to see me too!
For the moment I was thinking, what the F@#$! What have my good friend does? Any mistake that she has done to deserve this in return? Unfaithfulness of her dear husband while she’s carrying his child in her womb??!

On that evening itself my friend’s husband contact me and asked me out for a tea session to talk things out. I was hesitating weather should I go or not? Anyway is their marriage right? Why should I be involved? I could pretend as nothing had happen before and I see nothing! But I CAN’T! because she is my good friend… and I really does not want this MAN to hurt her at this time of her life. So I went to a café and sat down have a serious chat with Desmond.(Her husband)

He is begging me not to tell my friend about the car incident and that he’s having an affair with his office colleague! What an ASSH^*#! I told him I choose not to tell Angie (my friend) is because No.1 she is pregnant now and is not a good time for her to deal with this! No.2 I want him to end this at once!
I’m not an expert in relationship counseling, but I love my best friend enough to involve myself in this matter. Many won’t understand why I had to go through all the trouble of this matter… but Ice Queen with the heart of ICE cannot just sit down and pretend as though nothing had happen. I’m still a human after all. I practically lectured Desmond for an hour and I can see his face in guilt and shame. Stil not satisfy, I told him to be faithful to Angie and ends this stupid affairs with that woman! That B*&%^h (Michelle), I knew because I’ve seen her once at last year’s Christmas party. She’s those type that will seduce man with boobs and butts and brainlessly disgrace herself in the woman’s society. She’s 1 of those that makes woman’s pride become extremely CHEAP!!

After about a week, I taught about the matter again. Actually I’ve listen to many stories through media, family members, and friends of friends… is a very common thing happen around the world for their other halve to cheat on them. Is just that this now happens to my own good friend and that I’m reacting so protective over her. I choose not to tell Angie because I WANT to safe the relationship and not to ruin it. I WANT the lil baby in Angie’s womb to have the love of both his/her dad & mom… I do call Desmond up to ask about things… and remind him how much Angie love and treasured him in heart. I guess that’s all I can do … many things are beyond my control… but I do pray… pray that God will bring them together again.

Since ever this matter happens, I feel quite scared... honestly… I’ve been hurt many times… and the pain in the heart is unexplainable… is even more painful than having a deep cut wound on our hands or legs. Is twice the pain!
Afraid to love again is 1 of the problem that most common problem for women that have been hurt. To all women, what will you do if 1 day you found out that your spouse is cheating on you all these while? Will you talk it out with him and ask for a divorce? Or you rather pretend nothing has happened just to stay in the marriage as long as you can because you love him too much to let him go?
For me…. I’ve tried both options above. Result is :

Reveal the truth at his face and asking for a break up to end things up is a decision to finalized the relationship and also the last heartbroken for loving that idiotic man. Is kind of cool… cause you are the 1 that dumb him first and you may even splash a cup of water on his face before you go :p hehe.. (so dramatic) but after that we gotto cried for few weeks and needs lots of time to recover.
To pretend nothing has happened before and act like a stupid every time you know he’s calling or texting the other B&*^%h or after seeing her and comes home with a tired face looking at you and still said to you “dear love I’m home.”
This choice is double the pain of dumping your man because you’re lying to yourself… you taught that close one eye on him will safe your marriage. Is that true? I will tell you my pass experience… every time I knew he lie to me or after a cheating has done, I pretend not to know and treat him extra nice so that I can win back his heart. But the way he treats me is becoming more and more cold and as though that I’m a mental retarded woman that is easily to be cheated on. I can’t feel the love anymore…I’m struggling to make things up and good again… each time I do this over and over again the pain becomes greater and greater… to 1 extend… I can’t take it anymore, and goes back to option 1. Dumb him.
So why have to go through a long process before ending it? Is because of “LOVE” and “HOPE”.

To all men out there :

There are a few things here I wanted to tell you guys on behalf of every fateful women in the world :

1) We trust and meaned every word we said in our wedding vows in front of you.

2) When we love… we give 100% we could not love halve heartedly…

3) We put our trust in you for the rest of our life because we love you truly from our heart. Please don’t break it into pieces after our looks have faded result of the process of getting old together.

4) We will still love you guys eventho you have more grey hairs as time goes by…and develop big

belly in future :p with a tiny hope that you guys will love us fatefully too.

5) We could sacrifice everything for you… for “love” sake! Doing all the house work, helping out

in financial loads (working), bearing child birth pain to have children of “us” together, and

other things are not as important anymore to us .. All WE want is only 1 thing. Fatefulness.

That leads to a happy marriage. I guess we don’t ask much from you men.

And if you guys now are having a fun time out there with some other woman… think deeply… the woman that loves you for you is waiting for you to come home safely at home. She is the 1 that will love you for the rest of your life no matter how your looks fade in future or if you become broke suddenly… or if you ever unluckily suffer from a chronic decease!
Ask yourself … will the woman that now you’re enjoying with do the same too? Will she?
Before is too late… safe your marriage now… safe your relationship… love your other halve like how she ever love you. I’m sure you won’t regret if in future you’re still holding her hand and enjoying your time with your grand children.

Cp: Ice Queen with love. =)

Ice Queen Fell Deeply In Love! (Chapter : 8 )

01/01/2011




Hi!.. It’s been almost halve a year I stop updating my blog *smiles*.
First of all, I would like to wish my readers here happy new year 2011. May all your heart wishes come true this year gals! Just remember… we always looks beautiful if our hearts are beautiful.


Well, I know everyone is very excited to see my title here right? Hehe..
Indeed myself is getting excited to type further into the story. So.. let’s get started.

Few months ago on 31st of August 2010 which is my country’s independence day (Merdeka), an angel cupid just shot my ice heart with it’s special arrow with fire to melt my heart away :p hmmm.. I think he must have read my blog so he designed this special arrow and plan it for me.





As usual… 1 day the single club agency gave me another phone call, and advising me to meet the last candidate. The 5th guy. I was quite tired and bored with their candidates already… and on the verge of giving up, and stay single for the rest of my life. But think again… I can’t waste my dad’s birthday present worth 1,300.00 right? So… I must as well just complete it and go for it nomatter how bad the situation will turn out to be. They gave me his number 1 week plus before he sms text me to asked for a date. While I was waiting the whole 1 and a halve week.. I was thinking, this guy must be quite a stuck up cause he gotto wait so long to even ask me for a date.
But another part of me felt that he’s special than others.. why? Cause he did not call or text me right after a few minutes the agent release our phone numbers just like the few other candidates before that.

So 1 Saturday, when I’m having a lazy breakfast infront of the TV, I got a text message from him. “Hi. I’m Jem, would you like to meet up tomorrow Sunday Caroline?” At the moment when I read the message, I felt that his style of asking is different from others as well.. quite polite and nice…hmm…I wonder how he looks like..? would it be bad like the four others? *a cold chill shivers down my spine* You know.. having to go through another nightmare like the past four is quite scary to me already..
Since tomorrow Sunday I promise my sister to visit her at her house already, so I replied Jeremy “I’m sorry , but tomorrow I will be busy. Would contact you again when I’m free to meet up. Btw do you have a Facebook? Maybe we could chat there first right? *smiles*”
Somehow he agreed in exchanging emails for FB. With a curious mind.. I rush in to my room and on my PC to try locating his FB. But don’t know why.. I can’t locate it and in FB says no such person. Maybe the email is wrong? Or did he give me a mistake spelling email? Omg.. why am I so anxious? Just a nother guy anw… oh well, I’l text him again.
“Hi Jem.. how come I can’t locate you with your email in FB? Did u give me the

correct email?”

After that.. he did replied something nice (but I forgot) :p hehe.. ice queen getting old and have bad memories. Anw.. he locate me instead and added me. I was surprise… to see that.. he is one of the best looking one among the four others. Very pleasant…and somehow.. acceptable in my list :p
So on Sunday evening… I text him. “ Hi Jem, are you free to meet up on 31st of August Tuesday?” I’m quite anxious waiting for his reply. Will he say yes? Waiting…. After a while.. he replied “Yes. Ofcourse. Where and when do you like to meet up at?”
A smile appear on my face… and then we carry on with the venue & time.

That day finally comes. I’m suppose to meet him at 1 Utama shopping mall infront of Cold Storage before we go for a dinner at a restaurant nearby.
So anxiously, I waited around there an hour earlier :-) Suddenly my phone beep. He said he was around…in front of the place. Oh well… seems like I can’t wait to see how this gentlemen looks like :p
Let’s do some mystery... I hide behind a pillar, and saw 3 men there. Hmmm…which 1 is Jem? There is 1 tall and looks ah beng guy, (Hope is not him) There is 1 middle age uncle man, (defenately not him) and finally there is 1 pleasant & quite good looking guy with black shirt and jeans making a call on his phone. He looks anxious too :p *giggles*
At the same moment my phone rang! Then I knew…it was him :p I pick up my phone and he says “Hey Caroline, where are you? I’m right infront of Cold Storage now”
I giggles for a moment.. omg.. he have a nice voice there.. :p Then I just replied “wait ya, I will appear in a minute.”



Then I walk to him..with my cat walking attractiveness style…haha..Just kidding. Not that exaggerated. He gave me a warm smile and a good hand shake. Oh ya.. his hand.. feel so warm and firm and looks so nice.. :p
I know is weird…but the whole dinner I cant help to look at his hand always.
He speaks very politely… gentlemen enough in his style and presentation.. and he have nice eyes like me.. and nice sharp nose with a good complexion and warm smile. I can tell that Jem must be a very neat guy. His outfit and everything looks so nice & tidy and he smells good with his man’s perfume.
Is just everything that I wish for on a man’s outlook and tidiness.
The dim spotlight at the restaurant shone on him and somehow.. my heart feels so warm and it’s beating fast.. (I hope I did not blush) :p

When it comes to conversation, I’m surprised we do have some things in common. Jem likes to watch TVB series like me too… enjoys movies a lot.. he loves the beach… and relaxing environment… same religion(chatolic).. and reading novels… & both of us are wearing contact lenses! really fantastic to have so many things incommon. I also like the way he talks.. proper in style, and polite + gentle, not like the others so rough and common.
When desserts was served, I can taste it is so much sweeter :p hehe… you can gues so why is it so right…? :p I look into his brown eyes… and in a sudden I thought I saw stars appearing around him..
I blink many times and thought what?? What happen to my eyes? And then it looks normal again.. you know what.. I think Ice Queen here…just got her ice heart melted away..

(Should i start singing the song "stupid Cupid" now?) :p

Sigh…falling in love was just so fast.. but I really curious does he like me too? I hope he do.. or maybe not.. L cuz someone as perfect would have go for better candidates right? Hmm…who knows…Let’s wait and see..
After dinner we walk around for a while before saying goodbye and leave.

I went home and prayed : Oh Lord, I really likes this guy and I feels so right when I’m with him. Please let there be a chance for us to fall in love happily .
Few days from that day.. Jem asked me out for movie at a place nearby my house. I was so happy that I can feel wings growing on my back and Im flying up :p I quickly open up my closet to plan what I can wear to look my best for the 2nd date!
On the day itself.. we meet up happily for lunch and movie. We watch a comedy and enjoys it very much. I really hope the time can freeze as im so happy to be with Jem..

After the 2nd date.. we do communicate through sweet phone calls and share our daily stuff with each other. The 3rd date came by and he brought me to the finest Italian restaurant which serves very delicious food there. When he drops me home.. he told me he have to go back to his hometown for a week plus…so won’t be seing me for a while. I felt a little sad and miss him, so...with a brave heart..i gave him a kiss on the cheek before I left his car.

It’s been 4 months now.. and.. we are a lovely couple inlove *smiles*
Even though throughout these few months…we do have some small arguments..and all..but I kept my patience and learned to love and give.
I’m very sure I love Jem because in my heart… it felt so different from I felt for others… and most of all… I finally let go the past of me with Tommy.. because Jem have filled up my emptiness that Tommy left in my heart with love again. I wish this love will grow successfully, honestly with each other and will never ends with hurts again..

How To Define Good Quality Guys In Range of A,B,C, & Fail Category. (Chapter 7)

10/08/10

First of all, I don’t really like to judge people like this cuz is kind of too cruel to be true.. *grins, but just think back on how guys used to judge us from the beginning I will think this is the time for a pay back guys! *evil laughter*

Denying? And so what is all these? >>> “whoa..look at her boobs, is almost the same size of a melon!” “long slender legs turn me on babe!” this is only the good side they are praising good modal looking girls and this is the critism to those common and not so good looking girls. 1 of my male friend told me this "nomatter how much a guy loves his girlfriend which is small size in boobs, at the end of the story he still wish in his heart that his girlfriend will have a boob job done and have a Cup C at least.” This is what I heard from a guy when I’m in a club “OMG! That fat ass is actually dancing on the stage..!hahaha just look at how her flabby fats is moving along with the music!” this is from my cousin’s mouth describing a small size female friend “Everything about her is small! How am I going to introduce her to my tall friends when her legs is as short as a Shizu dog’s leg?! Lol!!” not enough of insult yet? Maybe this is far enough to make us female goes on strike! “OMG! Lol!! I’d rather F**k a dog than that piece of shit looking pig bi**h there! LOL!!!” I heard this from a Caucasian tourist guy during my vacation to langkawi beach.

Alright, I admit that outlook is very important to everyone, but even I do not use such harsh words on them or in front of them because is not their fault to born with ugly looks or having a fat body. So why make others sad when they actually have a big heart inside? You must be thinking “what? Ice queen suppose to be the queen of critism! Why is she turning warm? Is she melting inside?” Answer is… yes, I doubt a lot recently, because I’ve encounter lots of good looking guys and at the same time bad & average looking guys. When I compare their attitude, the good looks sux because of their attitude, and I’m surprise how the average looks ones can actually touch other’s heart with their big heart inside.

This is some examples of good looking guys. I know this guy from a club event at Zouk club.

Name : Thomas. Age: 27. Job : Social Graphic Designer.

He is very friendly to everyone, especially sexy girls. An Australian Chinese that works here for leisure. When I try screening through his Facebook, all kinds of night club parties photos he took with lots of sexy good looking mix race girls, Caucasian girls and bla bla bla. He also drinks a lot and he will never put his status single, as usual...leave it blank. Typical playboy style when he speaks to girls. Exp : “Hey princess, care to join me party tonight?”
Now this is the formula of calculation to grade guys :
LOOKS / ATTITUDE x [JOB+AGE]

So let us calculate Thomas’s grade. ;p
Handsome category / playboy & never commit attitude x (Graphic Designer + 27 years old) = Grade B-

Conclusion: you know why there is a minus? Because you see.. His looks at first sight is grade A then divide by his playboy attitude and too much of socializing around pulls his marks down to C+ but his job is consider stable and interesting + his age is just nice for every mid 20th girl’s bf so the marks pull up to B-. This shows that looks is not always grade A and the best and we sure wouldn’t want a playboy and never commit guy to be our boy friend or husband because…it will never be a good ending ;) unless you would like to give it a try on 50-50 % luck :) but remember 1 thing, to go after this type of bloke you must be beautiful from top to toe. If not, you can walk away and forget about it.

Okay...let us see candidate number 2. This guy is also from the same group in the club event.

Name: Harry. Age: 25. Job: Modeling + stage show + diving instructor.

Harry choose his friends, those who are leveled with him will be in his circle, those who are too common and a nobody will be kick out of his circle. His outlook is perfect! Tall, great body size and very handsome.
Because of all his benefit from the looks, that is why he is taken as some of the magazine’s male modal and also some bridal gallery male modal.
And because of this also he is a show off and quite snobbish person.
Seriously I really don’t like this guy. Hmm? Normally ice queen loves handsome rite? WRONG. This is some of the things why I hate him.

In his facebook, he also put up all kind of clubs events pictures with pretty girls around, but he also add a lot of his modeling pictures and there is 100 of comments from girls! Either than that he thinks highly of himself too. For example, he likes to post out his stage show events in FB, then he will kept on asking everyone to go for the show. “hey everybody, I will be staring as Mat hatter at wonderland forever. Do come and see my show, remember ladies.. is meeee. See you there!” In addition, he also add on a lot of comments on how good he is in modeling and how he looks like a film star. He likes to be famous.

Let us calculate Harry’s grade here ;)

Very handsome / Snobbish & show off x (Model & diving instructor + 25 years old) = C-

Conclusion : Very Handsome suppose to be Grade A divide by his attitude of snobbish & show off pull the grade down to B- then multiply with his unstable job of modeling & diving instructor pulls down to C and then his age of 25 is a little too young for a guy to commit as both boy friend or husband. So pulls down to C-. Yes, very handsome but got a C- because of the personality and attitude as well.

Remarks : why is his job as a modal & Diving instructor unstable? Because when he gets older in age, looks will wear off and nonetheless no body would want an old diving instructor to teach them right?


This is a bonus picture of Thomas & Harry enjoying their party night out. Can save it as a desktop picture if you want. Lol!






























Here comes our 3rd candidate:

Name: James. Age: 25. Job: Assistant Brand Manager


James is an energetic good looking young guy. He is quite friendly and have many friends. He likes sports and love to build up his body. Even though he looks like a Mr. Macho here, but as you know him, he could be quite child-like in his character most of the time. He loves traveling, have so much fun and as usual... no commitment. He sounds so much like a teenage boy to me and definitely not my type, but if you’re interested in cool young guy, can always ask me for his number. Haha!

His grade:

Good looking / Sporty & child-like x (Assistant Brand Manager + 25 years old = B-

Conclusion : Good looking will give James a B+ but when divide by his Sporty & child-like personality pulls marks down to C, because not much girls would prefer a sport kiddy as a boy friend… but looking as his job as assistant brand manager raise his marks up to B again cuz is reaching managerial level at his young age is consider well doing for a guy, but the marks were pull down a little to B- because of his young age meaning that he is not ready yet into a serious relationship.


Here is our 4th candidate, which I dislike him the most.!

Name: Gary. Age: 25. Job: Junior photographer



Have you ever heard of the simpulan bahasa “bodoh sombong”?
& yes. Gary is a very irritating guy, which thinks that he is super handsome, likes by many girls and very smart. In fact, the truth is…
He is 1 of the worst looking guys in this whole group of guys! He looks like a monkey to me and have a skinny body and very dark complexion. 0% attractiveness! Why am I so mean to criticized Gary is because he never respect girls at all! He thinks too highly of himself! Give you an example : 1 of my normal looking girl friend was just being friendly to him and try adding him in her FB. You know what is his responds? He said, “ Mommy told me not to add strangers to my FB. haha!” then he added “I still likes girls who are taller than me even though I’m not that tall. Lol! & I prefer good looks” I feel like puking when my friend told me all these. Such a F*^%r! Try to look at his picture… I think even a Bangladeshi at the road side is even better looking than him! I’m really sorry for my language but I think this kind of person shouldn’t even exist in the world!

Wanna know his grade? :
Ugly looking / stupid & f***ng attitude x ( Junior photographer + 25 Years Old) = F (FAIL!)

Conclusion : Ugly Looking is already not an advantage, so I give him a C because we should see a book by its contents as well. Sadly..when divided by his stupid & f***ng attitude, the marks got down to D- ! Multiply by his unstable job of Juniour photographer which is nothing great about… and his age is too young to be stable & too stupid too be so immature! Brings the marks down to F=FAIL!


Try to look at them :






Isn’t Gary the monkey guy looks the worst of all? Blueekk! :p















So in the end.. what i'm trying to say is there is no A+ grade for any guys in the world...
and that is because no1 is perfect including our ownself. What is important is the good personality...and....stil plus a lil of nice looks. hehehe... (Can't help it ok...I'm Ice queen :p)